PEACEMAKING – Part 2 – The Life-Changing Power to Heal Relationships

Despite the conflicts we encounter every day, the Bible presents what can seem to be a challenging command regarding relationships. Jesus emphasized that Christians should stand out because of their EXTRAORDINARY LOVE FOR ONE ANOTHER in a world where sinful people are constantly tearing each other apart. John 13:35 – “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (NIV)

Then, Jesus prayed in John 17:21,23 – “21 that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me…23 I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.” (NIV)

Why is Christian love so distinct and unique? Because the world does not widely understand love. People will never know true love apart from Jesus because a society ruled by sin is a world ruled by self. But Christians have been changed by the gospel. So our lives should be filled with LOVE, HARMONY, and UNITY.

Unfortunately, we fail, and many people judge us, Christians, not by how well we get along but by how divided we are. Every time Christians fight, whether at home, in church, or anywhere else, everyone watches and thinks, “They’re just like the rest of us.

When Jesus lays out His vision of PEACE, it might appear like He expects the impossible from us, right? There seems to be a big gap between the problem of conflict and Christ’s promise of peace. In a world that knows only about entitlement, quarreling, and fighting, is peace really possible?

Knowing the right thing to do will never bring us peace. We’re all aware that we should love. But we’re also aware that we need to assert our rights. So it appears to be so out of reach. Our problem isn’t knowing what to do, but having the power to do it. We’ve all made New Year’s resolutions and then failed to keep them. We promise to try harder but fall short. When we try to put God’s commandments into action, the same thing happens. God’s commands are perfect. Scripture’s instructions are especially beneficial for us. However, we lack the ability to obey.

As the apostle Paul explains, the law is powerless in and of itself (Romans 8:3). So, without a power source, all the relational tools and techniques in the world are meaningless. I could give you ten surefire ways to be nice, but they will never make you a better person.

We must admit that we cannot obey God’s command to love in our own strength. As frustrating as that inability is, there is still hope. God would never promise us love and healthy relationships unless He also provided a path to get there. God does not say, “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another, but you’ll never get there because you’re so evil.”

Our God is faithful and loving that He shows us the way. But first, we must determine what it is. God has a solution for our inability to love and to make peace; His solution is the GOSPEL.

What is the Gospel? What is the good news? The gospel is God’s power for peacemaking. And apart from understanding the gospel, we can’t access God’s power. The gospel is the good news that ​Jesus died on the cross to pay for our sins and rescue us from hell, and came back to life to give us a new life.

By God’s grace and through our faith in Jesus Christ, we’ve been reconciled to God, adopted into His family, empowered to love even our enemies, and given the gift of enjoying Him forever.

Colossians 1:21-22 clearly expresses the relational impact of the gospel, “21 Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. 22 But now he has reconciled you by Christ’s physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation (NIV).” John 3:16 captures the gospel perfectly, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” (NIV)

It takes more than getting baptized, going to church, or making an effort to be a nice person to believe in Jesus. None of these activities will be able to wash away the sins you have committed and will continue to commit throughout your life.

Believing in Jesus requires first admitting that you are a sinner and that there is no way for you to earn God’s approval through your works (Romans 3:20; Ephesians 2:8–9). Second, it entails believing that when Jesus died on the cross, He paid the full penalty for your sins (Isaiah 53:1–12; 1 Peter 2:24–25).

Believing in Jesus simply means trusting that when He died on the cross, He exchanged records with you and gave you His clean, sinless record in exchange for your dirty, sinful record, which opens the way for peace with God. We receive the gift of eternal life through this gospel.

However, the gospel is more than just a ticket to heaven. Too often, we treat the gospel as if it were a plane ticket to be used on a distant day in the future. We don’t pull out the gospel until we’re in the hospital and only have a few days to live. Then we tell our children calmly, “Don’t worry. I know I’m going to heaven because I placed my faith in Jesus. I believe in the gospel and hope in eternal life.”

Yes, the gospel provides great comfort when we face death. But if we forget that the gospel is also for our life here on earth – for sins we struggle with everyday, for areas where we still want to grow, and for broken relationships – we miss out on the rich treasure that is ours in Christ. There is a treasure in heaven for us, but God does not want it to be reserved only for eternity. It spills into our daily lives if we simply reach up and accept it.

If we only view the gospel as the key to eternal life, we will miss God’s grand plans for us. God desires that the gospel completely transform every aspect of our daily lives. Yes, the gospel provides us with eternal life. But the gospel also transforms us into a new creation through His purpose, power, and plan. 2 Corinthians 5:17 – “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” (NIV)

The truth is: God is still working on us, and the gospel is REMAKING us. We set out on a journey to become more like Christ through the gospel. The Lord is constantly working in our lives to shape us into His likeness. God is constantly working in us in order to change how we deal with conflict, by His work in us.

The first step in God’s plan is for us to recognize His graciousness toward us in the message of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Even when we don’t deserve it, he shows us kindness. The gospel tells us everything God has done for us through Jesus Christ. The gospel informs us that we are new people because of Him. And the gospel teaches us how we should live our lives daily. (Colossians 3:12-15)

When I read that passage, my natural tendency is to jump right to the “shoulds,” making a mental list of everything I should be – compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, patient, and so on. Then I try to follow those rules by those standards but fail miserably. The commands are beyond my ability.

But there is another option available to me. Rather than start with what I should do for God, I begin with what God has already done for me. I constantly remind myself that God has chosen me and that He loves me. The gospel truths overflow into a new way of life. They transform me to become a better version of myself. God is patient with me, so I may be patient with others. Christ forgives me, therefore I am able to forgive. Because He loves me, I am able to love and live in peace with others.

You could think, “That still seems impossible,” when you start to understand these gospel truths. You’re right. You should be able to love, but you can’t. You know you should do this and that, but you lack the willingness and desire. As a result, you need power.

Understanding how graciously God treats us through the gospel of Jesus Christ is only the first step toward change. The gospel empowers peacemaking by inspiring us to pursue relationships we never thought we’d have this side of heaven.

We must also encounter the gospel’s living power, Christ living in us. Jesus desires to dwell in us completely so that our minds and hearts, our understanding and desires – are transformed to be like His. “I know I should do it, but I can’t. . “, is the cry of every sincere Christian. So you pray: “God, I can’t do this. I know I should forgive. But I’m lost unless you do the work in my heart.” Friends, You will discover that God answers those prayers.

God works on our spiritual transformation. He softens and opens our hearts, causing our desires to change. This is what happens when Christ is in us. It’s a life-changing power to heal relationships.

When the gospel has an impact in your life, you will treat others as God has treated you. Here’s just a glimpse of what could happen when the gospel enables you:

1. You can love your enemies. Even though you were His enemy, Jesus died to reconcile you to God. So you can imitate Him by showing the same kind of undeserved compassion and sacrificial love to those who wrong you (1 John 3:16; Luke 6:27–28).
2. You can take initiative in resolving conflict. You were still a sinner when Christ died for you. So you can make the first move to seek reconciliation with anyone who offends you or has something against you (Romans 5:8; Matthew 5:23–24, 18:15).
3. You can admit your own faults. Because Jesus has already seen your sins in all their detail and taken them on Himself, you can stop hiding your sins. Stop thinking about your reputation. Honestly, apart from God, we don’t have a good reputation. You can bring your sins into the light through confession, trusting you will find mercy and cleansing through Christ (1 John 1:8-9).
4. You can make conflict an opportunity to witness. Your life is no longer your own. Jesus bought you by His blood and made you a full-time ambassador of reconciliation. By His grace you can use every conflict as an opportunity to model His reconciling love and encourage others to believe in Him (2 Corinthians 5:15–21).

 

LIFE GROUP DISCUSSION:

1) Is your reaction to hurt or offense in your life an attempt to seek revenge? To wound the person who has wounded you? If so, explain how you feel that getting revenge or wounding your offender would resolve your problem. Would that resolution bring lasting peace, or only add to your pain as a victim? Are you seeking relief or release?

2) Some responses to hurt and offense are not obvious. Instead of an outburst of anger or hope for revenge, there is the quiet, subtle eating away of a bitter heart. Is this your response to those who hurt you? Why can this kind of response be even more deadly than an outburst?

3) What characteristics in your life might indicate that you haven’t fully forgiven past hurts, even if you know in your head what you need to do?